“To the Child Within ”

To the Little Girl I Once Was:

Though you try to hide your sadness
And there’s not a tear upon your cheek
I understand that life
Has left you broken and so weak
I want to try to reach you
Even though you’ve gone so far away
But I also understand
That you can’t trust a word I say
Because those who have claimed to love you
Have hurt you to your soul
To disappear and numb yourself
Has become your major goal
I understand your urge to run
The need for a place to hide
The building of your many walls
Believe me, I, too, have tried
To retreat into isolation
To avoid feeling all the pain
To bury emotional chaos
So not to go insane
But I’m not going to leave you
No, I will find a way
To show you that love isn’t bad
And to make you want to stay
I know that you’ve been shaken
To your very core
Your lost, confused, and frightened
And don’t know what’s in store
If you can’t trust your own mom and dad
The world’s a frightening place
But I’m here to tell you now
That there’s no shame or disgrace
That come’s from what you’ve been through
Don’t believe the things they’ve said
It was their way of rationalizing
All the sickness in their head
You are a child of innocence
Of beauty and such light
And I’m here to protect now
And through the coming nights
You don’t have to answer me
Just know that I am here
And whenever you are ready
Together we’ll chase away your fears
The fear that you’re too damaged
To ever know how to truly love
The fear that there’s no safe place for you
Beneath the stars above
The fear that your pain will never cease
And a lack of trust is all you’ll ever know
The fear that your real emotions
On the surface can never show
The fear that all the sadness
That’s buried in your heart
Will one day start to erupt
And tear you all apart
The fear that no one’s here for you
And your completely on your own
The fear that comes from a lack of your mother’s love
And all the unkindness she has shown
The fear that you’ll go crazy
With all this chaos in your head
The fear that you’re a bad person
For wishing them both dead
But we’ll work all this out together
Because to see you hurting makes me sad
And I’m mad about what’s been done to you
It’s your parents who were bad
I pray one day your realize
And never have a doubt
That the sick, cruelty you’ve experienced
Is not what the world’s about
Because there’s a lot of goods things in this world
And I see the beauty of  your soul
To see a smile upon your face
Has become my one true goal
But right now I’d like to just sit and hold you
Until you’re ready for us to start
I promise not to leave you
Until there is happiness in your heart